Fuji: [speaking about 'Crocodile' Dundee] Do you know who that was?
Cato: No.
Fuji: Clint Eastwood.
Fuji: [speaking about 'Crocodile' Dundee] Do you know who that was?
Cato: No.
Fuji: Clint Eastwood.
Miles: Iris, if you were a melody… I used only the good notes.
Sergeant John Kinley: You are out of your bounds, Ahmed. You are here to translate.
Ahmed: Actually, I'm here to interpret.
Albus Dumbledore: It is not our abilities that show what we truly are. It is our choices.
Ace: That's quite a wrap you're wearing! Perhaps I could get you some fluffy new slippers made from the heads of innocent and defenseless baby seals!
Skinny Husband: Who is this ghastly man?
Ace: Ace Ventura, pet detective. And YOU must be the Monopoly guy! Hey.
[whispering]
Ace: Thanks for the free parking.
Pompous woman: Another ACTIVIST, McGuire.
Skinny Husband: Activist, yes.
[snobby laugh]
Ace: [imitating him] Activist, yes, mhmhmhmhmhmhmhmhm!
Pompous woman: Mr. Ventura, there is nothing wrong with enjoying the fruits of nature. You should try it sometime.
Ace: Alrighty then!
[smacks man in the face which knocks him unconscious, drapes him over his shoulders and begins to sing and dance exotically]
Ace: [shakes man] Do not pass go! Do not collect $200!
[hands back man to pompous woman]
Ace: It's lovely, but I fancy myself an autumn!
Ellie Haworth: I don't think being afraid to try is a good enough reason for anything.
Karen: If you're from Africa, why are you white?
Gretchen: Oh my God, Karen, you can't just ask people why they're white.
Ace Ventura: If I'm not back in five minutes… just wait longer.
Kenny Kwan: [on the phone] One suit, sponged and pressed, for Mr. George Kaplan, room 796. Anything else?
Cal: I have loved her even when I hated her… only married couples'll understand that one…