[last lines]
Elizabeth: Observe, Lord Burghley, I am married. To England.

[last lines]
Elizabeth: Observe, Lord Burghley, I am married. To England.
Dina Byrnes: I had no idea you could milk a cat!
Greg Focker: Oh yeah, you can milk anything with nipples.
Jack Byrnes: [He reacts] I have nipples, Greg, could you milk me?
Jack Langdon: Do you want to come in?
Katie: No, no, no. I wouldn't want to intrude.
Jack Langdon: Oh, no. It's potluck. There's always way too much food, and it's warm.
Katie: Oh, really?
Jack Langdon: Yeah, but I mean, if you have somewhere to be…
Katie: Well, I could come in for a minute.
Jack Langdon: Oh, really?
Katie: Yeah.
Jack Langdon: Oh, OK.
Kurt Nygren: Thought you were the press officer, not a police officer.
Aspen: Well… that thing with the ladies will have to be put under wraps. You, of all people, know what can happen when a situation gets sticky.
Lauren: You know, I'm curious. With so many possible reasons, which one's the one your wife left you for?
Jim: Cancer.
Lauren: [awkward pause] I'm sorry. I naturally just assumed you were divorced.
Jim: It's OK. I naturally assumed your husband shot himself, so we're even.
Avery: I'm glad we scheduled this during our lunch breaks so we could do this together!
David: Hey, you took a business call too.
Avery: David, we're choosing our wedding cake and you hardly even looked at them.
Howard: Boys, I don't want to speak ill of your mother on Christmas, but she's nothing but a common street whore.
Karen: If you're from Africa, why are you white?
Gretchen: Oh my God, Karen, you can't just ask people why they're white.
Jack: [to Ruth and other guests dining at their table] Well, yes, ma'am, I do… I mean, I got everything I need right here with me. I got air in my lungs, a few blank sheets of paper. I mean, I love waking up in the morning not knowing what's gonna happen or, who I'm gonna meet, where I'm gonna wind up. Just the other night I was sleeping under a bridge and now here I am on the grandest ship in the world having champagne with you fine people. I figure life's a gift and I don't intend on wasting it. You don't know what hand you're gonna get dealt next. You learn to take life as it comes at you… to make each day count.
Molly Brown: Well said, Jack.
Candice Adams: How come everyone had a better time at my wedding than I did?
Sawyer Adams: Because you had a terrible date.