Diana Scott:
Taxi!
Robert Gold:
We’re not taking a taxi.
Diana Scott:
Why not?
Robert Gold:
I don’t take whores in taxis.
Diana Scott:
What do mean?
Robert Gold:
That’s what you are isn’t it? A little whore! Isn’t it?

Diana Scott:
Taxi!
Robert Gold:
We’re not taking a taxi.
Diana Scott:
Why not?
Robert Gold:
I don’t take whores in taxis.
Diana Scott:
What do mean?
Robert Gold:
That’s what you are isn’t it? A little whore! Isn’t it?
Samantha Jones: There ought to be a law against hiring a nanny who looks like that.
Carrie Bradshaw: Yeah, the Jude Law.
Astrid Young Teo:
It was never my job to make you feel like a man. I can’t make you something you’re not.
Hitchhiker:
You heard of this thing, the 8-Minute Abs?
Ted:
Yeah, sure, 8-Minute Abs. Yeah, the excercise video.
Hitchhiker:
Yeah, this is going to blow that right out of the water. Listen to this: 7… Minute… Abs.
Ted:
Right. Yes. OK, all right. I see where you’re going.
Hitchhiker:
Think about it. You walk into a video store, you see 8-Minute Abs sittin’ there, there’s 7-Minute Abs right beside it. Which one are you gonna pick, man?
Ted:
I would go for the 7.
Hitchhiker:
Bingo, man, bingo. 7-Minute Abs. And we guarantee just as good a workout as the 8-minute folk.
Ted:
You guarantee it? That’s – how do you do that?
Hitchhiker:
If you’re not happy with the first 7 minutes, we’re gonna send you the extra minute free. You see? That’s it. That’s our motto. That’s where we’re comin’ from. That’s from ”A” to ”B”.
Ted:
That’s right. That’s – that’s good. That’s good. Unless, of course, somebody comes up with 6-Minute Abs. Then you’re in trouble, huh?
[Hitchhiker convulses]
Hitchhiker:
No! No, no, not 6! I said 7. Nobody’s comin’ up with 6. Who works out in 6 minutes? You won’t even get your heart goin, not even a mouse on a wheel.
Ted:
That – good point.
Hitchhiker:
7’s the key number here. Think about it. 7-Elevens. 7 dwarves. 7, man, that’s the number. 7 chipmunks twirlin’ on a branch, eatin’ lots of sunflowers on my uncle’s ranch. You know that old children’s tale from the sea. It’s like you’re dreamin’ about Gorgonzola cheese when it’s clearly Brie time, baby. Step into my office.
Ted:
Why?
Hitchhiker:
’Cause you’re fuckin’ fired!
[First lines]
Vida:
I’m not picking that up. Not until you say sorry.
Arthur:
Well, then it’ll stay there till a new owner moves in, or you get a new boyfriend.
Sarah:
You get one more sentence.
Nyles:
OK. Even though I pretend not to be I’ve realized that I am completely co-dependent but I’m cool with it because I think that life should be shared now and I need you to survive, but it’s so much more than that: I know you better than anyone knows you and remember the night that we saw the dinosaurs you said it yourself in order to ever really know anyone you need to know the entire package the good and the bad and I’ve seen your package and it is excellent Sarah & you’re my favorite person that I’ve ever met and yes I know that it’s crazy odds that the person I like the most in my entire life would be someone I met while I was stuck in a time loop but you know what else is crazy odds getting stuck in a time loop… I hope that blowing ourselves up works but it’s really irrelevant to me as long as I’m with you and if it kills us well then I’d rather die with you than live in this world without you!
Alex Fletcher:
It doesn’t have to be perfect. Just spit it out. They’re just lyrics.
Sophie Fisher:
”Just lyrics”?
Alex Fletcher:
Lyrics are important. They’re just not as important as melody.
Sophie Fisher:
I really don’t think you get it.
Alex Fletcher:
Oh. You look angry. Click your pen.
Sophie Fisher:
A melody is like seeing someone for the first time. The physical attraction. Sex.
Alex Fletcher:
I so get that.
Sophie Fisher:
But then, as you get to know the person, that’s the lyrics. Their story. Who they are underneath. It’s the combination of the two that makes it magical.
Andrew Paxton:
Three days ago, I loathed you. I used to dream about you getting hit by a cab. Then we had our little adventure up in Alaska and things started to changed. Things changed when we kissed. And when you told me about your tattoo. Even when you checked me out when we were naked. But I didn’t realize any of this, until I was standing alone… in a barn… wifeless. Now, you could imagine my disappointment when it suddenly dawned on me that the woman I love is about to be kicked out of the country. So Margaret, marry me, because I’d like to date you.
[Rod has just told Jerry he will keep him as his agent]
Jerry Maguire: That's, that's great. I'm very… happy.
Rod Tidwell: Are you listenin'?
Jerry Maguire: Yes!
Rod Tidwell: That's what I'm gonna do for you: God bless you, Jerry. But this is what you gonna do for me. You listenin', Jerry?
Jerry Maguire: Yeah, what, what, what can I do for you, Rod? You just tell me what can I do for you?
Rod Tidwell: It's a very personal, a very important thing. Hell, it's a family motto. Are you ready, Jerry?
Jerry Maguire: I'm ready.
Rod Tidwell: I wanna make sure you're ready, brother. Here it is: Show me the money. Oh-ho-ho! SHOW! ME! THE! MONEY! A-ha-ha! Jerry, doesn't it make you feel good just to say that! Say it with me one time, Jerry.
Jerry Maguire: Show you the money.
Rod Tidwell: Oh, no, no. You can do better than that, Jerry! I want you to say it with you, with meaning, brother! Hey, I got Bob Sugar on the other line; I better hear you he can say it!
Jerry Maguire: Yeah, yeah, no, no, no. Show you the money.
Rod Tidwell: No! Not show you! Show me the money!
Jerry Maguire: Show me the money!
Rod Tidwell: Yeah! Louder!
Jerry Maguire: Show me the money!
Rod Tidwell: Yes, but, brother, you got to yell that shit!
Jerry Maguire: Show me the money!
Rod Tidwell: I need to feel you, Jerry!
Jerry Maguire: Show me the money!
Rod Tidwell: Jerry, you got to yell!
Jerry Maguire: [screaming] Show me the money! Show me the money!
Rod Tidwell: Do you love this black man!
Jerry Maguire: I love the black man! Show me the money!
Rod Tidwell: I love black people.
Jerry Maguire: I love black people!
Rod Tidwell: Who's your motherfucker, Jerry?
Jerry Maguire: You're my motherfucker!
Rod Tidwell: Whatcha gonna do, Jerry?
Jerry Maguire: Show me the money!
Rod Tidwell: Unh! Congratulations, you're still my agent.
Annie:
Mrs. Burbridge, would you come over here for a moment? Has it escaped your attention that these children have head-to-toe poison oak?
Adele Burbridge:
Well, no, I… well, yes, but…
Annie:
But what? My children are in need of medical assistance! And you can sit here and smugly lecture me on the importance of tests? Tests which exist to pigeonhole children’s potential, a thing which cannot possibly be measured, least of all by anal-compulsive huns! And my husband may be a ”large child,” but that’s none of your business! And my children may be rotten, but they’re mine. And I think that they’re bright, and sensitive, so I have no doubts whatsoever about their intelligence. I do, however, have serious doubts about yours!