Hamid: What's that?
Rambo: It's blue light.
Hamid: What does it do?
Rambo: It turns blue.
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Hamid: What's that?
Rambo: It's blue light.
Hamid: What does it do?
Rambo: It turns blue.
Youngblood Priest: You ain't got shit. Literally. You're three months behind on your mortgage payments, and I don't care how many gangsters from Joyland you got with you. Ain't nobody more gangster than a bank.
Adam Walters: Hey, Merry is just out of an imaginary relationship, Darlene.
Merry Griffin: There we go.
Darlene Walters: And that is your business because…
Adam Walters: Because her heart is still mending. You really think she's ready to meet somebody real?
Morticia: Wednesday's at that very special age when a girl has only one thing on her mind.
Ellen: Boys?
Wednesday: Homicide.
McAllister: "Show me the heart unfettered by foolish dreams and I'll show you a happy man."
John Keating: "But only in their dreams can men be truly free. 'Twas always thus, and always thus will be."
McAllister: Tennyson?
John Keating: No, Keating.
Mark: Well, I can always find time to save the world. And Bridget, you're my world.
Scott: Say good night, asshole.
Luc: Good night, asshole.
Girl Scout: Is this made from real lemons?
Wednesday: Yes.
Girl Scout: I only like all-natural foods and beverages, organically grown, with no preservatives. Are you sure they're real lemons?
Pugsley: Yes.
Girl Scout: Well, I'll tell you what. I'll buy a cup if you buy a box of my delicious Girl Scout cookies. Do we have a deal?
Wednesday: Are they made from real Girl Scouts?
Maya: I wish we lived in a world where street smarts equals book smarts.
Dr. Karl: Okay, remember when I said that all marriages are savable? Well, it ain't gonna happen for you guys.
Amy: So what do you think we should do?
Dr. Karl: Well, as a therapist, I'm not allowed to tell you what do to. But, uh, as a human being with two fucking eyes in my head, yeah I think you should get divorced as soon as possible. This is some catastrophic shit.