Captain Harris: Don't touch those! Don't you ever touch my balls without asking!
Etikettarkiv: Komedi
Ett päron till farsa firar jul
Clark: Hey! If any of you are looking for any last-minute gift ideas for me, I have one. I'd like Frank Shirley, my boss, right here tonight. I want him brought from his happy holiday slumber over there on Melody Lane with all the other rich people, and I want him brought right here! With a big ribbon on his head! And I want to look him straight in the eye, and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey shit he is! Hallelujah! Holy shit! Where's the Tylenol?
Hundraettåringen som smet från notan och försvann
Allan Karlsson: [when finding the therapist dead on the floor, having choked to death on a champagne bottle cork] He's drunk himself to death quite quickly, he has. Well, at least he won't have to have any hangover tomorrow.
Fortsätt läsa Hundraettåringen som smet från notan och försvann
Legally Blonde 2: Red, White & Blonde
Paulette: Ooh… the bend and snap! I did that last night naked. I broke a window though.
Hundraåringen som klev ut genom fönstret och försvann
Allan Karlsson: If you want to kill me, you'd better hurry, because I'm 100 years old.
Fortsätt läsa Hundraåringen som klev ut genom fönstret och försvann
Legally Blonde
Emmett: Did you take Mrs. Windham on a date?
Enrique Salvatore: Yes.
Emmett: Where?
Enrique Salvatore: A restaurant in Concord, where no one could recognize us.
Emmett: How long have you been sleeping with Mrs. Windham?
Enrique Salvatore: Three months.
Emmett: And your boyfriend's name is…
Enrique Salvatore: Chuck.
Emmett: Right.
[Everyone gasps/laughs]
Enrique Salvatore: Pardon me, pardon me. I thought you said friend; Chuck is just a friend.
Chuck: YOU BITCH!
Lost in Translation
Jack: Hey!
Ally: What?
Jack: I just wanted to take another look at you.
Postanvisningen
Ibrahim Dieng: To tell you the truth, decency has become a sin in this country. And that's why I'm going to become a wolf among wolves! I too will become a thief and a liar!
Mr. & Mrs. Smith
John Smith: [while driving, pursued by hit men in three black BMW'S] I never told you, but I was married once before.
Jane Smith: [slams on the brakes]
John Smith: What's wrong with you?
Jane Smith: [slapping John's arms and legs] You're what's wrong with me John.
John Smith: It was just a drunken Vegas thing.
Jane Smith: Oh, that's better. That's *much* better.
[pause]
Jane Smith: What's her name and social security number?
John Smith: No, you're not gonna kill her.
Zombieland: Double tap
Bill Murray: [dying] Is that how you say hello where you come from?
Columbus: Oh, my God. Oh, my God, I can't believe I shot Bill Murray.
Tallahassee: Mr. Murray?
Bill Murray: I'm just Bill, I think, now.
Tallahassee: Bill?
Bill Murray: Yeah?
Tallahassee: [pokes at Bill's wound] I don't think we're gonna be able to stitch this.
Bill Murray: Ah. That's still tender.
Tallahassee: You think you might pull through?
Bill Murray: No.
Columbus: If it means anything now, I am so sorry. It was just instinctive.
Bill Murray: It was my bad. I was never a very good practical joker.
Little Rock: So do you have any regrets?
Bill Murray: "Garfield," maybe.