Etikettarkiv: Komedi

Blades of Glory

Blades of Glory

Citat

Jimmy: So, Coach, I was thinking about the music for our routine.
Coach: Oh, really?
Chazz: We're gonna dance to one song, and one song only: "Lady Humps" by the Blackeyed Peas. "What you gonna do with all that junk, all that junk inside your trunk? I'm a get you, get you drunk, get you drunk off my lady humps, my humps, my humps, my lovely lady humps."
Jimmy: [disgusted] I'm not skating to anything with references to lady humps. I don't even know what that means.
Chazz: No one knows what it means, but it's provocative…
Jimmy: No, it's not, it's gross…
Chazz: …It gets the people going!

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Polisskolan 2 - första uppdraget

Polisskolan 2 – första uppdraget

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Lt. Mauser: [Mauser and Proctor are spying on Lassard greeting the new recruits in his office] So… these academy rats are going to save the precinct?
Proctor: Hey, personally, lieutenant, I hope they fall flat on their asses.
Lt. Mauser: That can be arranged, you know?
Proctor: What do you mean?
Lt. Mauser: Well, if they fail, I take over as commander of the precinct.
Lt. Mauser: So?
Lt. Mauser: So… we make sure they fail.
Proctor: Who?
Lt. Mauser: The new recruits.
Proctor: Why?
Lt. Mauser: If they fail, Lassard's out, I'm in. And I'm gonna need somebody to be the new watch commander. And you know who that's gonna be.
Proctor: [confused] Who?
Lt. Mauser: [annoyed] You, dickhead, you!
Proctor: Oh… oh… well, good idea.
Lt. Mauser: You're not playing with a full deck, are you?
Proctor: Oh, I don't play cards.

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Logan Lucky

Logan Lucky

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Warden Burns: As warden, I can approve buying a copy of A Dance With Dragons for the prison library to go up on the Game of Thrones shelf. Now, the only problem is that The Winds of Winter and A Dream of Spring have yet to be published so those aren't available. Well, I can't do anything about what I can't control.
Naaman: That is total bullshit! George R.R. Martin was supposed to deliver The Winds of Winter to his publisher over two years ago.
Warden Burns: I know that was the original deadline. That's what it says here. But I'm reading to you from the Wikipedia page. It also says that Martin had a grueling promotion schedule or something, and it's interfered with his writing schedule. He's failed to complete The Winds of Winter.
Naaman: That don't make no sense. Those two guys who transferred in from Federal last month knew about all the new stuff with the hot chick and her dragons.
Warden Burns: No. I'm telling you, I believe those two inmates had that information from watching the TV series. Again, I'm reading to you. The series has jumped ahead! It's no longer following the books!

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Natt på museet 2

Natt på museet 2

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Kah Mun Rah: [Darth Vader holds his hand up with a pinching motion] What is that? What is that? What does it mean? I don't know… you've lost me. Is that your breathing? Because I can't hear myself think.
[pause]
Kah Mun Rah: Let me tell you kindly, just simplify. There's too much going on! You're not evil, you're asthmatic, and what's with the cape? Are we going to the opera? I don't think so. Goodbye!
[Darth Vader and Oscar the Grouch leave]

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