Morgan: Mother, did you get the two dick pics I sent you?

Morgan: Mother, did you get the two dick pics I sent you?
Balin: [sees a chamber full of dead dwarves, with their only means of escape blocked] The last of our kin. They must have come here hoping beyond hope. We could make for the mines. Might last a few days.
Thorin Oakenshield: No. I will not die like this, cowering, clawing for breath. We make for the forges.
Dwalin: He'll see us! Sure as death.
Thorin Oakenshield: Not if we split up.
Balin: Thorin, we'll never make it.
Thorin Oakenshield: Some of us might. Lead him to the forges. We kill the dragon. If this is to end in fire, then we will all burn together!
Harry Hogge: Cole, you're wandering all over the track!
Cole Trickle: Yeah, well this son of a bitch just slammed into me.
Harry Hogge: No, no, he didn't slam you, he didn't bump you, he didn't nudge you… he *rubbed* you. And rubbin, son, is racin'.
Charlie: Once upon a time there were three very different little girls who grew up to be three very different women with three things in common: they're brilliant, they're beautiful, and they work for me. My name is Charlie.
Loretta: Why are you so handsome?
Jack Trainer: My father was a weatherman.
The Oracle: What about the others?
The Architect: …What others?
The Oracle: The ones that want out.
The Architect: Obviously they will be freed.
The Oracle: I have your word?
The Architect: What do you think I am? Human?
Robbie Ferrier: What is it? Is it terrorists?
Ray Ferrier: These came from some place else.
Robbie Ferrier: What do you mean, like, Europe?
Ray Ferrier: No, Robbie, not like Europe!
The Architect: You are here because Zion is about to be destroyed. Its every living inhabitant terminated, its entire existence eradicated.
Neo: Bullshit.
[the monitors respond the same]
The Architect: Denial is the most predictable of all human responses. But, rest assured, this will be the sixth time we have destroyed it, and we have become exceedingly efficient at it.
Sebastian: So Hanna, is your mum and Dad still together?
Hanna: My mother is dead.
Sophie: [to Sebastian] Nice one, Dad.
Sebastian: I'm sorry to hear that. I lost my mum when I was very young, so…
Hanna: It's all right. It happened a long time ago.
Rachel: Hanna, what did your mum die of?
Hanna: Three bullets.
[Sebastian chokes on his wine]
Pegasus: English, we can't afford any mistakes. Not tonight.
Johnny English: The word "mistake," sir, is not one that appears in my dictionary.